Would You Survive An Alien Invasion?

I must admit that, even though I realize consciously that it’s fake, I was jolted into disaster mode just by watching the trailers for the new movie Skyline set to release this Friday. Piles of destroyed cars and upturned asphalt—all that wreckage would certainly make for a big humanitarian disaster! If that were to happen, the American Red Cross Central Valley Chapter would be on the scene. Whether it’s a natural disaster or an act of terrorism (by giant alien robots), the Red Cross is there to help. So, in case of an extraterrestrial attack, here’s how I think we might pitch in, and how you could help, too:

Learn First Aid: 

When you get hit by a laser or your car is crushed by a giant robot, injuries are going to happen. Be ready to help by learning first aid! Learning how to distinguish minor injuries from major ones can save a life. You’ll learn how to put a splint on a broken bone, treat cuts and burns and prevent further injury.

Become a Volunteer:

The Aliens would certainly throw our cities into chaos. But Red Cross volunteers are trained to deal with highly stressful situations and to help people cope with disasters. Your apartment building is set on fire by evil intergalactic monsters? Our volunteers will be there to make sure you have food, clothing and shelter. We do the same for regular people in the Valley every day.

Make a Disaster Supply Kit: 

If you need to leave town because, well, the Aliens are wreaking havoc, it’s good to have a kit to grab and go. Put important items in there, and a little cash, since the Aliens have infiltrated all of our networks and systems which will prevent all of our ATM’s from working.

Emergency Tracing Services: 

Was your spouse of child abducted? I wouldn’t worry, the Red Cross has been providing tracing services for over 100 years, we would be able to locate them, even aboard the mothership, because Red Cross Disaster Teams Members never stop working. Now whether they have been brainwashed into the intergalactic rebellion and no longer the person they were, well…that’s kinda your problem.

Service to Armed Forces: 

Okay, okay, maybe it is OUR problem. Luckily, our SAF response team has been offering grief counseling to those who have had family members deployed or dealing with the loss of a loved one. So if worse comes to worse, we would be there to provide support and comfort to you in your time of need.

So what do you think? How would you react during an Alien invasion? Would you Survive? For more information on how to be prepared, contact your local American Red Cross at (559) 455-1000.